Starseed

I heard the word

starseed

when I was a kid,

something about children being born from aliens.

I laughed when I heard the idea

because it was something I’d never heard before

and

at the time

I didn’t think much of the possibility of humans breeding

or being bred with

extraterrestrials.

True or otherwise,

I didn’t know about the stories

of the Nephilim,

or the Watchers,

about Niburu and Planet X

and there’s so much more I still don’t know much about.

Sometimes 

I think of thinking of being born a world apart,

a child to parents from a distant land

is simply a way to exoticize my own life,

a way to make myself different from who and how I am,

just a desperate attempt 

in a desperate world

and caught in

desperate times.

There is a part of me wishing

to be pulled back from the stars,

to be pushed back to the world around me,

to be forced

to create beauty and

magic

and wonder

and as much as I yearn to be the starseed,

I so similarly yearn to be an earthseed

who can bear

the fruits of

harmony

and beauty

and love

and truth.

To be a starseed would give answers in some ways,

but I doubt those answers would do much

to heal 

any of the pain I’ve learned from life on earth.